Muted 40th

So I turned 40 on Sunday and it couldn't be more different to my 30th. The biggest thing for me is not yet being pregnant. I really expected to be by now - that was my goal - but I have very mixed feelings about this last year of my 30s and reaching this 40th milestone because my biological clock is a ticking and a tocking and I keep relapsing with my mental health. I really hope I'll get back on track in my 40th year..

It’s been the total opposite to the last year of my 20s where I had enormous fun doing 30 things to do before I’m 30. A third of the year has been a disaster - hospital, car engine blowing up, anxiety and panic attacks and the latest, a slipped disc, which has rendered me pretty much housebound for over a month now and meant cancelling my next adventure with mum to Croatia..

So it’s been hard to see the good bits when I keep having setbacks, but I can see them - our incredible holiday to India and Nepal where we met family we’ve never seen before and found mum’s childhood home still standing in Calcutta, the many concerts and shows I’ve been waiting over two years to attend thanks to Covid19, catch ups with family and friends, a brand new car, and, despite being locked in a terrible bout of anxiety, managing to update my CV, interview and be offered two new jobs at once, one of which I've now started and it's incredible how much more time I have in my life to enjoy things.

I had to mark the occasion in some way because that's just who I am - so, in true King Gary style, we went crazy golfing at Cabot Circus in Bristol which was a lot of fun with my family.