Sectioned again

I'm waiting for a bed on a psych ward. Yesterday I had my mental health act assessment. I had a lovely HCA as my daytime 1-2-1 and she came in with me to help me advocate for myself. I didn't get a chance to go to hospital voluntarily this time, they decided straight on a Section 2. That was disappointing, especially as I took my Dr's advice earlier on in the morning and didn't throw anything at them! My chats with the psych liaison team have been up and down as usual.

Being on a 5.2 section with the nurses all weekend is definitely better than being on a 136 section with the police, like I had last time. No offence to the police, but a hospital environment feels a lot less scary when your mental health has gone pearshaped. I'm so glad I can wash myself and change my underwear and change into a gown, but trying to eat a roast dinner with two plastic spoons is interesting.

My night 1-2-1 lady on Sunday evening was a psych prison guard at Broadmoor for 21 years! I promised her I would try to be on my best behaviour, but I still ended up dissociating and trying to walk out of hospital she told me in the morning. She did say at least I wasn't running as she would have never been able to keep up! I like it when I can laugh about my mental health with people who are there to help and support me. It makes it feel a lot less frightening.

I don't want to go back into hospital but I do want to know if I have bi-polar. I hope we can get to the bottom of this. The highs are great but they are definitely not sustainable.